euu typedd*:
blog
(Tuesday, July 03, 2007-)
+11:43 PM]*
# -
The thing is...
After a fight or any major dispute between 2 close friends, its like a ritual to meet up physically to ensure that both parties are sincere about still being friends.
well, the problem is that on monday, what i was really angry was at that meeting being cancelled. and when i offered an alternative, well i didnt receive an answer at all. even if i did, i felt like it was pting to 'nah i don't wanna meet' direction.
I don't know whether it sounds like an unreasonable request. but what i really wanted was to just see you lo.
I know i have been very unreasonable... Very mean with the way i say things to you. perhaps if i still have another chance, i will filter out some thoughts to be spoken at all...
Honestly... i haven't been a very good friend as of late... with what landed on our relationship. ya...
I have become very pessimistic. Paranoid. Unappreciative.
All in all, I am starting to suck.
sorry dear... somehow sorry doesnt really cut it anymore. no matter how i try, no matter how i want to.
Maybe its my fault for not being able to lie at such a crucial moment...
Sorry... theres nothing more i can say...
How i wish i could offer more...
This is my final entry...
good bye.
the story ends like this;
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+11:10 PM]*
# -
...
I think...
Fuck...
What kind of thoughts are these?
Animosity fills the soul.
i lost the ability to see whats gonna happen...
my sight is so clouded by torrent doubt and distrust...
someone juz save me la...
the story ends like this;
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+9:47 PM]*
# try try try n try.-
I'm trying...
I don't know how else can i say it.
I'm trying...
Really I am...
=(
the story ends like this;
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+7:34 PM]*
# -
I'm becomin a jerk. someone stop me. i m pushing someone i hold dear.
shit.
what izzit tat i want.
so depressing my tgt are.
oh dear
the story ends like this;
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(Monday, July 02, 2007-)
+6:25 PM]*
# Worst of Times.-
Apparently, i aint allowed to stay happy for too long. I cant be allowed to smile for more than a month. if not, i would probably be struck down by a series of suay events.
Right now, i got nothing but sadness and frustration.
The worst is that its affected the people around me.
I am seriously losing myself. No matter what I try, I cannot seem to stay me for a long period of time.
I guess somewhere sometime i committed something so bad that I will be constantly plagued by people who disappoint me. As of now, I don't know what is more saddening; my life or the people i know.
Or maybe its because i expect too much out of people. well, i guess thats the only conclusion i can form.
I remember a good friend once telling me, "When it comes to real friends, we don't count the favors we give each from time to time. Because the minute we do, we lose sight of that friend and think of him or her as someone who is in debt to you."
Gosh. I have to relearn this lesson.
In the end, I don't think I'm a good friend at all.
I flare my temper when i don't feel good.
I take my anger on my friends.
Oh dear.
Fuck. I need a revamp.
the story ends like this;
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