euu typedd*:
blog
(Wednesday, December 13, 2006-)
+11:35 AM]*
# My agony. Your Misunderstanding,-
I dun noe wat to say. I noe i have been dealt 2 great blows.
One is tat she is goin to aus to study.
The second one is tat i juz lost my best gal pal.
I can onli feel my heart shattering. Over n over again.
In front of me, i see a distant desert. yet my will tells mi to go on. its kinda silly.
The first agony is quite obvious.
The second agony is a long built up unhappiness on her side.
Come lets begin.
The first day, i met her. i had a crush on her. It was silly.
Everyday i tried. I got pushed away. Eventually i turn my eyes away. But my heart, it was still dere. It was wif her. In a way, i grown attached to her as a brother. i felt compelled to be dere for her. Her reliance on me was comforting. So comforting, u can consider it to be a sort of an emotional pillar. Someone tat kept mi getting up. She was someone special in my heart.
after i got over her, we became great frens. i dare not say best frens becoz she wun tink tat way.
Despite all the fights. The constant bickering. I can even recall an incident. I got angry over she not wanting to tok to me in the bus. How i wish i understood earlier tat she wanted to be alone. How i wish tat she needed some space to herself. how i wish tat i knew wat to do. i didnt noe tat my presense was enugh. tat it was comforting to her. how i wish i understood tat earlier.
Anyway, our fights always boiled down to one thing: our misunderstanding.
I told myself. I will try myself to understand her. even if i dun, i will make do it wif it. she has her reasons. I will change myself to suit her. My resolve is iron. I will not give up.
But u see, recently, tat was our last fight. She told me: we cannot be close frens, juz frens.
I was n still am devastated. Heart spilt all over the floor. Juz as i was about to really try. REALLY change and not juz blame, i was cut off. Wat i am left wif is the choice. I duno wat to choose. i am indecisive.
I dun understand u. But i wan to.
My sincerity is dere. Feel it. take it.
Know tat i really wanna try.
I dun expect close frens to be made by juz knowing your name.
Nor izzit made in one day.
Understand my need. Understand my saddness.
For you to let mi try i understand u, i will give anything.
the story ends like this;
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